THIS IMPORTANT SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT HAS BEEN BROUGHT TO YOU BY AGENTS OF THE INTERNAL REVENUE SERVICE. HAD THIS BEEN AN ACTUAL CRISIS, YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN INSTRUCTED ON WHEN AND WHERE TO SURRENDER, AND HOW TO AVOID CAPITAL PUNISHMENT. THANK YOU AGAIN FOR VOLUNTEERING YOUR HARD EARNED CASH TO PAY THE SALARIES OF EMPLOYEES OF THE SPOILS SYSTEM.